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| DESERT LOVE SONG by Jan McCall Duet for Baritone and Soprano From The Janus Company Radio Theatre's production of "Two on the Nile or That Old Fashioned Mummy of Mine" Originally sung by Mallory and Elizabeth Lewin When the white desert calls out to me And the sand streams through my hair How my soul is yearning as my skin is burning And my eyes are blind from the glare. Oh the vast desert's a shifting sea Where the waves sandblast my skin. How my heart is beating to hear the camels bleating And catch their scent on the wind. (bridge) Darling, I will carry you to my tent Where I'll ravish you there on the mats. And when all of our loving is spent We can take turns at beating off rats. For the wide desert is wild and free And the chance of survival is weak In these desolate spaces You'll be my oasis And I will be your sheik. (bridge) Love is like the grains of sand on the breeze That get caught inside my B.V.D.'s. Darling, when you stop to gaze into my eyes Don't tarry too long or we'll attract flies. Yes, the great desert's a melody We can sing all our lives long. So if we're feeling randy, it's time to get sandy And sing the Desert Love Song! Copyright © 1978, 2005 by Jan McCall Geller and Mallory Geller |
| HEAR MALLORY SING "THE DESERT LOVE SONG" AS A SOLO BY CLICKING ON THE JANUS FACES! |
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| Two on the Nile or That Old-Fashioned Mummy of Mine Words, Book and Music by Jan McCall Ridolphi Geller with special contributions by Mallory Geller and Mike Hodel It’s 1978, or perhaps, for the moment, it’s the mid-1920s, and Tut-mania is sweeping the country. The “Wonderful Things” Howard Carter discovered when he first peered into the ante-chamber of Tut’s tomb have excited the hearts and souls of the world, as well as its music, motion pictures and fashion. For those of us with the Janus Company Radio Theatre the thrill was kindled with the tour of the tomb treasures of the boy-king Tutankhamen. We waited in line for what seemed like hours for a quick glimpse of the long-lost wonders. (Too quick, the 2005-6 tour is far superior, although the world-famous Gold Mask is not included.) Serendipity was at work here for the Janus Company. In the mid-1960s Jan had written a song for the stage show People Story titled, “I’m the Last of the Red-Hot Mummies (from Down South in Egypt Land).” And with a little electronic and mechanical tweaking, parts of,a band suite she had composed in college, “Circus Parade,” sounded like it was played on a 1920s Victrola. We had a another Radio Musical! Jan set to work putting it all together. The company at that point consisted of Mallory and Jan, Jerry Bono, Mike Hodel, Mel Gilden and Elizabeth Lewin. Jan had dibs on the red-hot mummy. Jerry also had his song, one of Jan’s more ridiculous parodies (of one of her own songs!), “I’m a Necrophiliac,” which Jerry insisted fit the theme perfectly. Mallory and Mike played rather unsuccessful archaeologists, hoping to top Carter and keep up their Royal Archaeological Society stipend. Mel was Abdool ben Schlep, the poor soul who had to do all the work, even though, as a Jew, he figured his people had built Egyptian tombs long before and he shouldn’t have to unbuild them now. Mallory wrote Schlep’s wailing lament. Elizabeth played the heroine with her high sweet voice which had just enough pepper in it to make the faux romantic duet, “Desert Love Song,” very funny. We had the cast; soon we had the show–a combination of adapted old numbers and new. |
| THE SETTING: Egypt, the Valley of the Queens, just after Carter has hit it big with his Tut find. The show opens with two middle-aged Englishmen, wearing pith helmets, sitting on a stone slab under a beach umbrella. An old crank-up Victrola is at their side as they drink lemonade and bemoan the fact that they haven’t discovered a thing. THE PLOT: Reginald Renway (Mallory) and Osmund Sacker (Mike), supported by the Royal Archaeological Society, are searching for a tomb, any tomb, and sing “Dig, Dig, Dig, (We Fellows of the R.A.S.).” They have the reluctant help of Schlep (Mel), who does all the work. Schlep sings a minor key parody of the Englishmen’s song, “Schlep’s Lament.” The Brits are worried because they’ve had notice that the R.A.S. is sending out one F.C. Fawlingsworth to review their work. F.C. turns out to be Fiona Cecilia (Elizabeth), a spunky young woman with whom Reggie falls hopelessly in love. She immediately points out that the slab that holds their beach umbrella is a fine example of a tomb entrance. Schlep hauls the stone aside to reveal an exquisite, and un-sacked, tomb, complete with “Wonderful Things,” including a marvelously intact mummy. The tomb is guarded by the mummy’s Ushebti (afterlife servant), Senokot (Jerry). Senokot, a nice enough fellow, offers to introduce them to Mummy (Jan), who unwraps herself in a strip tease, “dancing on the radio” as she and Senokot sing “The Last of the Red-Hot Mummies.” Now Ossie is in love. Schelp, sensing a kindred soul, suggests to Senokot they go look around a bit. They decide to spy on the now paired-off couples and listen as Reggie and Fiona sing “Desert Love Song.” Hiding behind a handy camel, Senokot tells his new friend his real turn-on, with “I’m a Necrophiliac.” Maybe not so kindred! But what else is there to do when you’re stuck in a tomb for thousands of years? They decide to check out Ossie and Mummy, and arrive in time to hear him romance her with “That Old-Fashioned Mummy of Mine.” But the eaves-droppers are spotted and everyone rushes in to discuss their fate. It is decided that the two “Boys” belong safely in school. Eton? No, not Eton—Aton! A proper parochial school! The cast sings “Aton, Aton, Ra! Ra! Ra!” as the sound of the band marching across the sand (don’t try it!) brings this half-hour musical farce to a rousing conclusion. |
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| "Two on the Nile or That Old-Fashioned Mummy of Mine was first heard on KPFK radio in Los Angeles in 1978. It was inspired by the wonderful King Tut tour and Jan's love for 1920s musicals. Here, from And Then We Wrote...and Re-Wrote... is its story. |
| TWO ON THE NILE OR THAT OLD-FASHIONED MUMMY OF MINE: It's background and history, the cast, plot and one of the songs from the Janus Company Radio Theatre Musical Farce. |
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| LOOKING FOR ELIZABETH! If anyone knows how to get in touch with Elizabeth Lewin, please contact her or us. We are working on a website for the Janus Company Radio Theatre and would love to have her record "Desert Love Song" again with Mallory! |
| TO HEAR MORE ABOUT THE JANUS COMPANY RADIO THEATRE AND THE MUSICAL FARCES, CHECK OUT THE PAGES BELOW: from "Two on the Nile:" "That Old Fashioned Mummy of Mine" from "Werewolf! The Musical:" "This is My Night to Howl "- music "Bela's Tent" - lyrics And find more throughout the site, as well as other songs from M&Mc. And there's a lot more in our book: And Then We Wrote...and Re-Wrote.. And check on the Janus face at the top of the page and the MySpace Mallory & McCall site for more MP3s of the songs. |
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